Once again I pride myself on being service-oriented and OH, DO I HAVE A TREAT FOR YOU! Our DIRTy Dater Guy came through and is giving us the honor of looking into his world of dating divorced chicks. The poor guy somehow manages to meet girls who are in the middle of a divorce or are newly divorced, so I asked him to tell us what it's like to be on the receiving end of CRAZY.
From my own personal experience and from what I have seen from the many divorced chicks I know, it's true that emotions are flying high and low for a while after the divorce. So I am fine with referring to myself as "crazy" and don't have a problem with divorced chicks, in general, being referred to as such. But on the other hand, I am now seeing a WHOLE LOTTA CRAZY from guys in their mid to late 30's and early 40's that you'll soon hear about.
We need a name for our DIRTy Dater Guy, so let me know if you have any fun ideas after you read his post.. I was thinking about Homer, in honor of Homer Simpson and how he always gives on-point advice (cough, cough). Let's just get right to it. Here is a little story from our guy, Homer. Feel free to express any and all comments with no worries about hurting feelings...consider this a therapy session!
I have to admit two things: 1) me and my divorced chick roommate laughed our butts off because it is sort of our life right now, and 2) I was impressed with the proper use of the word "whose."
HOMER'S VIEWPOINT
The divorced dirt chick thinks Men are Crazy – I’ve dated divorced chicks and I can say that most, if not all, are also crazy!!
The question my friends always ask after these ‘relationships’ (I use this term rather loosely) end is "why?" Other than the fact that I am a glutton for punishment, and obviously haven’t learned anything in life, I guess there are various reasons.
The first that comes to mind is that my friends and family probably thought I needed some loving so they decided to set me up with one of their ‘divorced friends,’ and usually one smack dab in the middle of their divorce. At the time, I more than likely REALLY needed some loving so I thought it was a great idea. Honestly, looking back, I still think it was a great reason – when you need sex you will basically go out with anyone – even crazy chicks in the middle of a divorce!
Seriously, they are an emotional mess BUT these women really seem to like sex, especially the ones who weren’t getting much in married life! What I didn’t understand at the time though was that all they really want is sex…not a relationship. Seems simple enough right? And as a guy it seems like the greatest situation in the world!! Well it’s not as easy as you think. Somehow they will make you think they want a relationship and they will want to spend every second with you – they seem to really like having you around. It’s probably because the ex was such a jerk or cheated on them or just was a crappy husband – I don’t know what the reason but they will want to talk to you, see you, text you, email you every second of every day. Whatever you do, do not start liking them and don’t act like you are in a relationship – that is the kiss of death! It’s a trap and if you fall for it things will go south in a hurry!
If you are not convinced divorced chicks are crazy, then if you get the opportunity to date divorced women whose husbands cheated on them, you will certainly find out that they are certifiably crazy! I have been lucky enough to get that opportunity…Yes, I know, I really am a lucky guy! I need to make this VERY important point…STAY AWAY FROM ANY WOMEN WHOSE HUSBAND HAS CHEATED ON HER! Did the caps make that clear?? Now I don’t mean stay away from them forever – just until they date several other guys and have completely moved past it (I don’t know if they ever completely move past it but let’s just say for purposes of this blog that someday they do).
One such woman was Kate. Kate was from Vermont (that should have been my first warning) had 2 pugs (an obvious 2nd warning), and getting a divorce from a guy who cheated on her (yes, I should have been running but I didn’t). Having been in this situation before I told Kate that we should take things slow, try to be friends until she was ready to date – she agreed. But then I made the mistake of sending her a card on her birthday and took her out to dinner as a birthday gift. Suddenly Kate just couldn’t get enough of me but I could tell she still had some heavy baggage from the ex.
As time went on (a few months of a lot of fun actually) the divorce started approaching and Kate began to lose it. She would want to hang out, we’d have a great time, then she wouldn’t want to see me, then a few days later she’d call and want to talk to me for 3 hours on the phone and tell me how much she liked me. To say I was getting mixed signals would be the ultimate understatement.
One day, she told me a story of how she found pictures of her ex and his new girlfriend in some compromising situations – I think that finally convinced me that this girl was not recovering any time soon, actually after hearing that story I just felt really bad for her…Luckily, soon after that she broke it off. However, one night I met up with her and her friends at a bar and she proceeded to get drunk and kissed me at the bar, and she would not stop holding my hand… We went back to her place and she told me I could sleep there so naturally I thought she might want to hook up. I was wrong. She was mad I tried something, I was beyond frustrated. I then proceeded to bang my head against a wall and got the hell out of there. That was the last time I saw Kate – she soon after moved across the country to get a fresh start (and hopefully become less crazy!).
While I laugh my butt off for the next few days, please discuss!!!!!
