Yep...it's been just over 2 years and every divorced man and woman I've ever met has told me, "you'll come out of this so much happier and better off." Well, I beg to differ!!! I think it still sucks. I still tell my friends who are having problems to work their chit out, because I personally do not think the grass is greener, at all.
Who are these crazy Happy After people?
Every single day I miss him. Every single day I wonder what happened. I have a gazillion new friends now who never met him, and they all tell me it's not HIM I miss, but that I miss being with someone. They just never met him. They don't know.
I know we had something very special. Only most days I just don't know how or why we changed and lost it. I have many ideas, but even after all this time I mostly I blame myself for being a biatch, or not skinny enough or not pretty enough or not fun enough.
I'm still trying to find someone else to click with, but mostly now I just want to be alone. I think something died in me on December 14th, 2009. I don't mean it to sound pathetic like it's coming out to be, but it's just reality - that's where I stand two years later.
